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Corona in a can? | 'Sunderland 'Til I Die' episode five review

It is episode five of 'Sunderland 'Til I Die', with Wembley firmly in the club's sights - but bef...



Corona in a can? | 'Sunderland...
Soccer

Corona in a can? | 'Sunderland 'Til I Die' episode five review

It is episode five of 'Sunderland 'Til I Die', with Wembley firmly in the club's sights - but before that bitter disappointment there is another of a different hue.

The opening for this episode is a grim, grey-scale portrayal of some aspects of life in the city. This is nothing to do with the club, but a heavily-policed 'Leave' rally, in the pissing rain, with Nigel Farage kitted out in tweed, like a Cold War Steve picture come to life.

Whatever one's own politics, it is hard not to feel that Sunderland typifies a Leave town; a once-proud place that has steadily de-industrialised, left to rot by political classes of all colours, who simply don't feel their votes are important. "It's a working-class city - most of these working-class people support Brexit," says supporter Peter Farrer.

"God forbid, I hope it doesn't happen, but these people have their opinion," he says, showing a rare degree of nuance towards people who think differently to him.

The nature of these reviews has been to find the fun in a fairly tragicomic circumstances at the club. But these are people's lives; ones that are being lived to the whistling indifference of wider British society, whether they are looking to borrow their vote for a referendum or paying lip service to public services and investment in the town.

“Football is the most important of the least important things in life," said Arrigo Sacchi.  It holds a few more degrees of importance in places like Sunderland, or Bury, or Bolton or many other British towns. It is easy and cheap to reduce people's voting choices to outright xenophobia (which is surely the case for many), but could also be just downright exhaustion with the status quo.

Still, we all know that Sunderland have no place in Europe.

(Sorry.)

'Sunderland 'Til I Die' - que sera sera?

On to club matters, and owner Stewart Donald is considering selling a club that is living hand-to-mouth. He believes that they need £10m year-on-year growth to go forward; the very definition of standing still being akin to going backwards. It is easy to wonder whether they would have bought the club had they seen series one, and the same goes for any prospective buyers now.

Still, there is some hope.

Sunderland are flying in the Checkatrade Trophy, with the Diet Tyne-Wear derby kicking off against Newcastle's under-21s. A comfortable 4-0 win puts Sunderland in sights of a final at Wembley; a win over Bristol Rovers copper-fastens it.

Wembley trips are a rare occurrence and the type of thing that nourishes a fanbase thirsty for something, anything, good to come to them.

“It’s the duty of the people who take over a football club to leave it in a better state than when they took it over,” said executive director Charlie Methven in an interview in 2019.

Methven, for his faults, does seem to believe those words. The little cut-away scenes of him with fans, walking the streets and so on do seem to show a man that has genuine affection for the city. He has castigated the fractured relationships between the club, the team and the fans and, despite often showing himself to be a touch odd, he does seem to want better for the club and for the city.

"Whatever happens in the final, I just wanted us to experience that day as a culmination of the hard work that has gone on in the last 18 months," he says.

Checkatrade

In the run-up to Wembley, we're brought to familiar theme of tension between Methven and an underperforming/lazy/exhausted (delete as applicable) staff.

The question is how the club make as much money from a final, which he believes will make more than £1m in one go. "It pays for half of Will Gregg," Methven says, seemingly genuinely.

It again makes a mockery of the club's pursuit of Grigg, as they sacrificed a serious amount of money while presumably looking to aggregated marginal gains by making small savings here, there and everywhere.

"...I asked for a tiger, mate."

In the embers of Wembers

And so, to Wembley. The squad get the train down to London and, in either a mood of communion with the supporters or poor planning, have to run the gauntlet of pissed fans to get on the coach. Who knew you could get Corona in a can?

What the blazes?

The match itself is against Portsmouth in the 'Series Of Shit Owners' Derby, and is treated with all the cinematic splendour of Citizen Kane. All it needed was Hans Zimmer doing a version of "Tonight's Going To Be A Good Night", but you can't have it all.

The match kicks off and you find yourself genuinely getting into it; really willing Sunderland on. Aidan McGeady gets a free-kick on the edge of the area, and belts one into the top-corner. The place goes mad, and you find yourself quietly clenching your fist.

"Look at him, he's magnficent, haway McGeads" says one female fan of McGeady, as if she's just walked in on David Gandy fixing her sink.

Half-time, 1-0. They couldn't, could they?

As ever with Sunderland, good things can't last. Pompey take control in the second half, and an equaliser has all the creeping inevitability of male pattern baldness.

"WAKE UP!" screams Methven at players that are doing that geeing-up hand motion to each other, instead of actually defending.

At 1-1, Pompey go clean through and lob the 'keeper. 2-1, into the last minute.

Cometh the hour, cometh McGeady. He jinks back at the far post and smashes home an equaliser. Haway McGeads, indeed.

...and then they lose on penalties. Lee Cattermole the latest in a butcher's shop window of sacrificial lambs.

"We didn't deserve that," says Joyce, the club chef. The team might have done, but the fans and the city don't.

Part one of our series of reviews is here.

Part two is here.

Part three, predictably, is here.

Part four - you guessed it.

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