It's a hard road the Mayo GAA fraternity do tread.
Theories about a curse on their Sam Maguire intentions stretching back to 1951 are yet to be disproven, and considering the strength of the current Dublin outfit, the myth could well survive a little longer.
And as they look towards another attempt at All-Ireland glory, we'd like to blithely throw out another theory which could explain why Big Sam hasn't wintered there in over 60 years.
This idea is entirely detached from anything to do with performance quality or titles won, but its relevance should not be discounted.
It doesn't always happen, but counties who qualify for an All-Ireland final have often produced anthems professing an undying love for the team. It's not a prerequisite by any means, and the Kilkenny hurlers would be a reliable example of a county who don't need outside intervention - musical or otherwise - to assist them in making routine work out of winning the Liam MacCarthy Cup.
But, if you're going to channel your county pride through the majesty of song, it helps if it's a tune of good quality. That's what separates your 'Dancing at the Crossroads' from your 'Jimmy's Winning Matches.' (And yes, I do stand by that comparison)
It's not that we're criticising this art form, it's that people are coming up with insufferable stuff and masquerading it as 'having the craic.'
Here are a few examples:
In The Name of Mayo
We begin with the most recent example of musical filth from Mayo followers. Before explaining why I hold nothing but disdain for this song, it should be prefaced with the fact that it was brought to our attention on Twitter under the caption - 'Mayo Song Alert.'
And with a title like that, it never really stood a chance after that. On a positive note though, the unidentified 'rapper' in this song definitely looks the part. In fact, it looks like apart from Mayo clad, the man has little else occupying his wardrobe.
Let there no confusion, this song is so bad, we didn't even listen to the whole thing.
Let me hear you say Mayo - Mayyyyyyooooo
Someone actually went to the trouble of recording their own version of this song. And uploaded on Youtbue. For public consumption.
The Saw Doctors - Bailing Hay
The Saw Doctors are a beloved rock band in Ireland, and with good reason. They're responsible for some timeless classics including 'N17' and 'I used to love her.'
But this song, which features a tribute lyric to the Mayo football team, will not be numbered among their better efforts.
"Will Galway bate Mayo? Do you think Galway will bate Mayo? Not if they have Billy Joe, they haven't a hope of bateing Mayo?"
Willie Joe is of course referring to Mayo legend Willie Joe Padden, whose son Billie Joe also lined out for Mayo. But that explanation is just for clarity and should not be misinterpreted as an endorsement of this tune.
The Saw Doctors - To Win Just Once
Disclaimer: This song is actually an enjoyable listen and, given the nature of the piece, it's arguable that this song does not merit inclusion in this list.
But it's the message of the song we don't agree with and therefore requires its inclusion. Who in living existence would settle with winning just once? The very concept of being satisfied with just the one victory is a misnomer.
Even if a person manages to win something once, it doesn't mean they didn't try to win it again. Consider Tyrone's Peter Canavan. His first All-Ireland win didn't happen until 2003, eight years after he made his first All-Ireland appearance.
The forward sustained an ankle injury in the semi-final win over Kerry and was a doubt for the final against Ulster rivals Armagh. He took a pain-killing injection at half-time and hobbled back into the fray in the concluding stages of their historic win.
Did he retire after ending the eight-year hunger? No. Peter played on for four more years and picked up another All-Ireland before finally retiring in 2007.
No one just wants to win it once.
Chris and Dave - Mayo for Sam
Another 'journey to Croker' anthem that assumes everything has to start on a farm. Cut to 0.40 and you'll also see a man with no trace of a beard trying to shave and talking about plans to get an 'I heart Horan' tattoo on his chest. Did he ever do it, I wonder?
Road to Croker Mayo4Sam)
Aside from some cunning trickery to work a reference to Beverly Cooper Flynn in here, we can only intensely pray that this song using the tune of 'We didn't start the fire' never ever reaches the ears of Billy Joel.
Mayo For Sam!
The term 'Mayo for Sam' reached saturation point about a year ago. And yet, the people will persist. And again, with a wretched song to accompany it. Basic song writing skills were being recklessly flouted in this one.
Sidenote: We actually have a soft spot for 'The Green and Red of Mayo.' Just in case there's anyone out there who thinks we have something against the entire Mayo music scene.
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